How to Leave Your COMFORT Zone Without Fear | Grow With Kepo Ep. 15

How to Leave Your Comfort Zone Without Fear

In this powerful episode of Grow With Kepo, Kepo is joined by empowerment coach, keynote speaker, and serial entrepreneur Franceska McCaughan. From climbing the corporate ladder in Dubai to launching multiple successful ventures, Franceska shares her raw, unfiltered journey of resilience, identity, and bold decision-making. Together, they dive into what it really takes to break out of comfort zones, silence internal shame, and take bold aligned action even when the world tells you it’s too late. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who feels the pull toward something bigger, deeper, and more true.

KEY TAKEAWAYS
• You are not lazy, you are misaligned
• Your brain is wired to keep you safe, not to help you grow
• Comfort is often mistaken for stability
• Bold action doesn't require certainty, only courage
• Quitting a “good” job can be the first step to real alignment
• Real risk is wasting your life avoiding risk
• Entrepreneurship is resilience, not just freedom
• Identity work is a path to real transformation
• The right community is living proof of what’s possible
• Regret weighs more than rejection

BEST MOMENTS
00:00:00. “We forget that we're very fucking capable and we can make anything happen.”
00:00:47. “You're not lazy, you're just misaligned.”
00:01:55. “We're not here to put you in a box.”
00:05:05. “I just made more money on my Emirate shoot than I did for three days at my corporate job.”
00:08:19. “I said, No, but I just spent a fortune on this education. There must be a typo.”
00:13:07. “We’re choosing regret every day over living with the possible feeling of rejection.”
00:17:22. “Within one year I had almost $50,000 just ghosted. I felt like overnight.”
00:29:57. “Victoria Beckham took 17 years to turn a profit in her brand. But she stayed in the fucking game.”
00:47:18. “Being in a community is proof when you don’t have proof.”
00:55:05. “You’ll go back to where you’re at right now, but probably better and wiser.”

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Transcript

0:00

We forget that we're very fucking capable and we can make anything happen. And that doesn't mean that suddenly you get on like, the trajectory of success and it's like just checkmarks all away. Like, entrepreneurship is hard, but it's about resilience. And I think so many people are so much more resilient than they think they are. They're just in this place of comfort because your brain is smart, is only job is to keep you safe. It will feed you bullshit about how dangerous it is out there. Here is something you need to hear. You're not lazy, you're just misaligned. I'm careful. I help high performance get on stock by taking bold, aligned action. And this is Grow with Keppel, where we speak with influential trailblazers who've made their mark and found the clarity that changed their lives. This is where we get clear, realign and move toward a life that actually feels like yours. Welcome to the show. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the show today. I have an absolutely special guest as you going tell from my voice, if you are listening that I am so excited because this person is a trailblazer. You know, when I talk about bringing on trailblazers and my in my podcast thriller, this is one of them because she has walked the path you all you know, there's this proverb that I always hear at my lab talk about about if you want to know how it is, ask the people that have gone down that path. And the person that I'm bringing on has gone down that path because she has done the whole thing, climbed the corporate ladder and built several businesses on our own and just like done really amazing things. And you know what? I didn't want to. I'll let her introduce herself. Francesca, welcome to the show, honey. Oh, my God. I'm so excited to be here. Wow. Yes, I would say, how do I sum up being a multi passionate person? I would say empowerment coach, keynote speaker, serial entrepreneur. But we're not here to put you in a box. So I think we should just dive right in. Yeah, and I love the ABC. We're not here to put anyone in a box, and that's exactly what we want to talk about. Tell us, what were you doing before? Like what was your corporate life like? And, you know, there's just stuff from there and then I'll ask you about things. So I like, I think a lot of corporate 9 to 5 years had the dream of like I just pictured out like glass box sales team, you know, being the top of the top of the chain. And my background was in hotel, so I went to hotel and restaurant management school. And I remember watching a hotel being built when I was in high school. And I just thought, That's cool. Like, I want to go work in a hotel, but I don't want to like, check people in. I want to go work in like a big office somewhere where, you know, it has to do with hospitality, but it's not the customer service side. It's more of like the development side. It's like, how do we how do we even make hotels, How do we even build hotels? How to how do hotels even exist? And when I graduated, I got the opportunity. I moved. I was living in Houston at the time. I moved to Dallas, and within one year I moved to Dubai. And in Dubai, I worked for a corporate office. I was working with vice president, presidents of three different brands. So we're talking about Fairmont Hotels, we're talking about raffles, we're talking about Swiss hotels. The owner of F or H, I saw Prince Alwaleed of Saudi Arabia, and I'm 23, 24, like newly married, moved halfway across the world. I'm living in an Arab country and I'm managing this team of like 12 Filipinos. It's like it's completely beyond what I was prepared for. But I wanted to climb the corporate ladder and I was there for about a year. And then I wanted to make friends and I wasn't making friends with the team. I was working with or the vice presidents I was working with. And a friend of mine said, Oh, you should go and an interview with this company. And I didn't know what this company was, but she's like, You'll make friends there. Well, ended up being a modeling agency. So I got signed and I was just going to these castings and I was going to these events and I was working any time I could outside of my 9 to 5. And it's a good thing I did that because it was my first taste of being a freelancer and I just was, you know, taking my lunch breaks and going to audition for some catwalk. And then on the weekends I was shooting a campaign for Emirates, and it was just this wild juxtaposition that I found myself in. But within a year of this corporate career, they had this amazing idea to basically downgrade me, to continue to climb the corporate ladder. And I just remember probably having too much to drink with my boss and my husband and his wife. We went out for a brunch and this was like a thing in Dubai. It still is. And I just told him, like, Look, this offer you've given me, I could go home and I can make more money at McDonald's than what you're actually paying me. And they really tried to sell me on the fact this is how you grow the corporate ladder after this position, you'll get promoted to this other position. And I just thought I just made more money on my Emirate shoot than I did for three days, and I've made an entire month. I think it's time to go. And that is when I left the world of employment as I knew it. It was 2012. I had no plan. I remember standing in front of my closet going, What do I wear now? Because I didn't wear suit. I didn't have anywhere to go. At a certain time. I felt really confused. I didn't have any plan. We definitely didn't have a lot of money where I was just going to sit at home and eat bonbons. So this is when I started leveling down on what Now? I look back as my entrepreneurial journey. So I'm kind of an accidental entrepreneur, if you will. Wow. Wow. Okay. Like I do think I was prepared for all of that when I asked you to tell us about your company saying, Oh, look at me. I have that myself. I know about that Dubai Life, by the way. Those, you know, endless mimosa brunches and all of that. And yeah, you saying it's a Dubai bling thing and I get it. But wow, what a journey. Like, first of all, I just wanted to say I am so I so admire what you've done so far. And it sounds like you just you don't waste time. It's like you saw an opportunity and just went right for it. Number one, you, your friend told you, Oh, you can make friends. Okay, I'm going, Say where you want to downgrade me? We hang on. I made more money here. You know what I'm doing? These are you. They have any, like, major plan or exit strategy? You just went for it. Let's dig deep more into that. Like, what did that feel like when? Because that's in this in 2025. It's it's terrifying to hear something like you don't have a plan. You don't have you have no idea. What do you know what inflation is? See, like I have families to feed, blah, blah, blah. You know, like, I just hear like the voices in the in the minds of people that are listening right now And tell us what was going through your your mind at that time. Like, I think, you know, part of me want to say I had a leg up, but I actually think a lot of people have legs up and they don't realize it. The way I grew up. I always had my back. So I entered the foster care system when I was 12. I grew up without running water for five years of my life, and I just always had this attitude that once I'm an adult, I get the incredible privilege to choose my life because as a child, I didn't get any choices. I didn't get choices. If I was going to be fat where I was going to use the bathroom, what strange family I was going to live with next. If it was going to be a safe night or I'm going to sleep on the roof. So by the time I graduated, so to speak, and at 18 and went into college and then went and got my first salaried job, I did the things that I thought I was supposed to do because that's what they tell you as a society like, you know, get a job. And I graduated right during a financial crisis. There were no salaried positions. In fact, I was one of the very, very few that got a salaried position. And even that I remember going to the assistant of the dean, who I worked for because I had to work and pay for my own college. And I sat down, I said, Hey, this offer, I think it was like 32,000 or 36,000 or 39,000 for the year. I was like, I think there's a zero missing. Like true story. And I remember she just looked at me and she was like, No, Francesca, Like, this is a starting this is a starting salary. And I said, No, but I just spent a fortune on this education. I mean, this there must be a typo. This is ridiculous. This is not makes sense to me. And she's like, Well, there's nothing you can really do about it. Francesca, You should be grateful you even have a salaried position. I said, Well, I'm going to negotiate extra time off. So I always had this fire in me like, This is right, this is wrong. And I always knew that I had my back, that I was going to make it work. I mean, I think about I've been married to my husband 15 years now, but we dated for ten months long distance. I was in Dallas, he was in Dubai. We had some issues in our relationship. We were already going to counseling. And I remember telling the therapist like a week before we were getting married. That worst case, if it doesn't work out, I'll just divorce him. And she was like, Oh, you're already thinking about divorce before you walk down the aisle. And I was like, Well, isn't that like a normal thought? I mean, we're not in the Medieval ages, but why would I just not even give this a chance? Because I fear it might not work out when I already know what the exit plan is. And I think so many of us get caught up in the fear of what is that? We say paralyzed. We don't even move where you are already in your exit plan. Like I always said, like, you know, I moved halfway across the world. I moved to live in the middle East. If I didn't like it, guess what? I can book an airline ticket and I can fly home if I quit my job and it doesn't work out for me. Guess what? I can go get a new job or I can freelance or I can ask my friend if I can work at their coffee shop for the next two weeks while I look for something like we forget that we're very fucking capable and we can make anything happen. And that doesn't mean that suddenly you get on like the trajectory of success and it's like just checkmarks all away. Like entrepreneurship is hard. I mean, up and down on the way up. That is a very real thing. But it's about resilience. And I think so many people are so much more resilient than they think they are. They're just in this place of comfort. And to stay in comfort because your brain is smart, is only job is to keep you safe. It will feed you bullshit about how dangerous it is out there and the inflation and we have mouths to feed. And yeah, all of that is going on. That is all very true. But there is also a lot of millionaires and billionaires out there that have had mouths to feed and there's inflation and like the world still goes on and one day you will die. And these are like fundamental facts that also you remember, I am capable. I have never let myself down. Why would I start now? And what is my exit plan like? What is my backup plan If this doesn't work out? And I guarantee you, majority of people are already living their backup plan, so why wouldn't you just fucking go for it? That is so. That is. You are so right. Because people, I think what ends up stopping people is they just think that they are stuck and they don't have any other option. And you know why even try? Because it's going I may feel anyways. It's kind of like the opposite of the mindset that you, you had in the beginning of your relationship where you had to switch it like, no, like you can be thinking that if you're going to go into something, then just go for it, right? And know that you can actually count on yourself, right? Imagine you going to a marriage is same thing. You go into a business thinking, Oh, you know, well, if it doesn't work out, I can always just back out of it. And there's twofold to that, right? Like, you should go into it with the idea that, no, this is going to work out. But I think what you're also saying is going to it knowing that whatever path you take, as long as you actually try it out, it is going to work out. There is something to fall back to. Is that good thing? Yeah. I mean, plot twist, it gets to work out for you. It might not work out exactly how you want it to, but you know, for me, there's always risk in life. Like whatever decision you make is a decision, even if you don't make a decision. So in that moment when I was having difficulty with my partner, it was like, okay, I have the decision to call off a wedding and see how this is going to go, or I have the decision to follow through and trust that this gets the work out for me because I'm not available for it not to. And if it doesn't work out, then what is my worst case scenario? Going through a divorce? Okay. Do I think I can handle a divorce Abso fucking lately, Do I think that I can handle living with regret, not knowing what it would be if I really didn't go for it? No. And I think so many of us are avoiding. We would much rather avoid rejection than living with regret. Like we're choosing regret every day over living with the possible feeling of rejection. And I think this is what's killing dreams. And I'm really hoping someone feels inspired. Now, if you knowingly know this person is not good for you and they're toxic in their abuser and you're saying, oh, well, maybe if he he isn't nicer to me, I can exit this relationship. That's not at all what I'm saying. I'm saying that I was in a position where I was 23 years old. I was fresh out of school. I was living in Dallas, Texas. I had the opportunity to move to Dubai. Four years, four days later, I'm getting married to someone who I genuinely believe was a man of my dreams. And we were having relationship issues because, one, he's 12 years older than me. We have a cultural difference. We're living halfway across the world and we have support. So do I believe that I can make this work if I'm 100% committed and he has to? Yes. Do I believe that if it doesn't work, I can get a divorce and everything's going to be okay? Yes. And for me, I think we have to look at the risk that we're taking. I mean, a lot of us think that we're bypassing risk, but actually the risk is that you're wasting your life year after year after year after year trying to avoid risk. It's like saving money. So, you know, it's there, but not investing it because you might lose it. You lose money every day that you save it, that you're not investing it simply because of inflation. And so we have to work backwards. Yeah, I absolutely love that. It's a goal with the conviction that is going to work out for you. And if it doesn't work out for you, you know that it's not the end of the world as you said something where you said, We all die and it's true. We all die. Nobody makes it out of life alive. Right? So it's a matter of what are you going to do with your one wild and crazy life between now and when you die? We all have that in common. We were born and we go die. You're also. What are you going to do between now and then? And regret does weigh a ton. I know for me personally, I have started and stopped a lot of ventures, you know, in trying to escape the 9 to 5 grind and escape, you know, the golden handcuffs and you all, if there is something that is out there, is anything more painful than the regrets, Francesca, that you talked about. And that is the thing right there. I you know, I'm afraid of all what if it doesn't work out? What if I feel what if I look stupid? What if I look like a beginner? What if, though? And I think for me, as somebody who has had those fears and who I started and stopped and also, you know, I have those regrets, I can tell you, I 100% agree with you that I regret is the biggest risk is waking up ten years later like shit, I should have started this been like eight years ago, you know? And even that thought process can weigh us down, right? Yeah. I think that also can keep you keep you stuck, too. So I would say anyone that's kind of struggling with sitting in shame because you're suffering silently in shame and like that's never going to get you anywhere. It's reframing it to like and I'm going to trust my timing and I'm going to trust that the right people are meant to come in my life now, and I'm going to trust that I'm actually going to have the better ideas now, and I'm going to be able to lead myself differently now. And I've been able to set myself up for success because the energy that we're using and I think honestly, the hardest part of entrepreneurship is like literally the thoughts And if we could be like a little ninja at the gate of our brain when the thoughts start coming in, when critical, Cathy wants to start reminding you about what a fuck up you are, you need a saying. Critical. Cathy on holiday like we she is not relevant to the conversation. She is no longer needed. And the beginning. I just have to tell her. Literally I'd be like, Cathy, you can go on vacation now. Like you. You. You can exit the room because it doesn't do any good. And there's going to be so many moments, even in entrepreneurship, that you're going to want to shame yourself for better decisions you could have made maybe firing someone or signing something or getting ghosted or having a payment plan fail or, you know, there was a time in my career in the online coaching space within one year I had almost $50,000 just ghosted. I felt like overnight and I was like, Oh my God, how does that even happen? Like, why aren't any coaches talking about this? Why don't we have integrity in this? And this arena? And I could have made that mean something about me and my skill set and and their transformations I was giving people. But wherever you're at in your 9 to 5 or in your career and your relationship, any time Shame wants to enter the room, you got to talk about it out loud or you've got to make a commitment to yourself that like. And I always say use and yet are but and things are different now. But I'm more equipped I have a better skill set. I haven't made that I haven't quit my job yet, but I know it's coming and that that's how you take your power back and you start sitting in that shame for too long. You. Oh my gosh, I, I know it's coming. That one. That one hit me differently because I am exactly in that position right now, at least as of the time of recording this. You know, where, you know, I'm doing it all like I'm I'm working the 9 to 5. But at the same time, I am working on making my dreams come true. I'm literally taking the risks. I'm taking the big steps. And, you know, I look at Salt Lake and I'm thinking, wow, okay, so 15 years later, I like this took talking about your relationship with your husband 15 years later, how many years have you been in business on your own now? 13 years. Okay. So 15 years later, you made a bet you're still with your husband. That is amazing. 13 years later, you are here and you've done all these amazing things. What would you what would you go back to? Till the Francesca of 12 years ago. So a year into starting out, doing your own thing, she was doing it right. I mean, when I think about my entrepreneurial journey, I'm a very intuitive person and my first business was cigars. So I had a cigar business in the Middle East. Honestly, I can't make this up. And, you know, I had clients like Dubai, Duty Free, Etihad Airways, Etisalat, like we we were huge in the Middle East and it was something that no one had ever approached the Middle East market. And here I was, I was like 24, 25 years old. American girl hosting parties with Hennessy, XO and Cavalli Club and introducing gold wrap cigars. I mean, it was ridiculous, but I love that. I loved that. If you can dream it, you can do it. And I loved living in Dubai because it was such a proof of that. You know, it was the wild, wild West. But things really needed to happen yesterday and they needed to be there today. But everywhere you looked, it was a reminder that you don't need to follow the rules. You set your own rules, you create your own life. And so I did that for about a year. And I was still modeling and I was doing events and I just I got really burnt out. And I remember at one point I just said, Well, I'm not doing this anymore. I didn't enjoy that The client I was working with, I didn't enjoy the product I was selling. I wasn't a consumer. I did enjoy working with the family side of it and I just sat down one day and I sent an email and I said, We're restructuring internally. As of now, we won't be able to fulfill any future orders. I literally closed my business. That was that was spending that was earning like five figures per month in a matter of an hour with a few emails that took me about a year to build. And then I canceled all my modeling contracts, just said, I'm no longer interested, I don't do this anymore. I fulfilled all my jobs and then I had about six months of shit what I do and I got really sick. I was really sick. I from stress and I thought, well, if my main motivator was money to prove to the world I was someone, because let's remember, I grew up without running water, I wanted to show the world that I was I was worthy. And I found that through how gritty I could be, how hardworking I could be, I just thought, well, what would what am I going to do next? And I felt like such a failure. I felt like so stupid. You know, I was always I always lived off like shiny objects. You know, I was always the super pretty bubbly girl. I got the, you know, hot, sophisticated house. Then I had the college degree. I went to work the salary job to move overseas, like everything had to be bigger and shinier. And I just in that moment, I knew that the cigars were done. And I thought, well, I want to work in a flower shop when I retire. And I just thought, Well, that is the stupidest thing. Why would I work, like for 40 more years? So I could finally actually go do what I want to do? Like that makes no sense. And I wasn't even driven by like it wasn't a money decision. It was just like it was so ingrained in me that you don't do what you want to do until you retire and you do what people can basically put you in a box and approve of you like, Oh, yes, she's successful. She's a business person, she wears a suit, she works with these kind of people, she speaks these kind of languages. And I just thought, okay, well, if I'm going to be a florist, how do I do that? And I literally Googled like, how do you become a florist? What's the difference when a florist and a floral designer? So if I could go back and tell that version of me like one year into entrepreneurship, her journey really hadn't started yet, to be frank, but she was on her way. But I would just tell her, like, you're doing it right, You're listening to yourself, you're listening to your gut. You don't actually care what people think. You're not in it for the money. And again, it's not because, you know, we have plenty of it. It just wasn't even a thought. It was just like, what would I do next? You know, I'm in this place where I've contracted this disease because of stress, and it was because I chased money. And that's clearly not working out like I'm not happy. I thought I would be happy. So what do I want to do? And that's when I thought, well, I guess I guess it's the retirement thing. Maybe we do the retirement thing before we go back and get a job. And that's really how it started. So trust yourself. Listen to yourself. You you already know. Yeah. And there are some of big things that you mention here, which is it's not even about chasing the money. It's about doing that thing that you really want to do now and in what is in the distant future into now and living your own life, not someone else's life cycles is designed for your life. Because I think that that is the trap that a lot of us fall into and say we don't even know that we're living by someone else's programing. Why in this matrix and say, Oh, and that is just say idea that this thing that I want to do, that I really want to do is just my hobby or it's just like is side thing. Why can't it be why kind of thing. Or like I told my client yesterday, all day in all those dots, why can't it be both right now. Like for me right. Why should I say that. Oh let me get so let me climb the corporate ladder first, you know, make some money, have some real estate investments, have a cushy for one key and then start my coaching business. Why, That's a trap. It's a trap. And the other the very dangerous part about that trap is nothing that we talked about, about the fact that no one makes it out of life, our life. But there's another angle to that. You don't know when your time is up and what a tragedy I think for me, I think my biggest fear is, is getting to the end of it all. And, you know, after I die, like seen how everything could have been for me and say, oh my gosh, I look at all the stuff that I missed out on like, wow, now, you know, So there is that. I love what you said about you thought the money was going to make you happy, but whereas actually, you know, what made you happy was doing the thing. And there is something I know the types of people that are listening to this right now or watching, they are thinking, Oh, of course, it was easy for you to do all these things. You you already had a job and you were married, so you had somebody else to foot the bills, the rents and all of that. People, we have this habit. If you are listening to this and you're thinking this, I know you are thinking it's actually because we have this habit habit of attributing other people's success. So other things so that we can say, Oh, look at me, it's not my fault I am a victim. Like, of course she had a leg up even if you literally just said you don't have a leg. Okay, So can you help these people understand some of the sacrifices that you had to make? And when you say you, you know, you burnt out, you know, entrepreneurship is hard work. Like let's go into more detail about that. So they know that even when you quote unquote, have a quote unquote, leg up or espoused, that may be at least is double income, someone can support you. Can you please help them understand that it's still not a walk in the park? Yeah, because, I mean, that was the beginning. It right. So if we flash forward a little bit, I go and become a florist and I have this international floral design business, and in 2019 I become the sole breadwinner of my family with my business. My husband has a midlife crisis. It's a huge financial drop in our in our home, something that I really wasn't prepared for. But when I think about entrepreneurship and even just going through the pandemic, like weathering that storm, reinventing yourself, creating a completely new business, you know, fronting all of that cash to be your investor, to make that happen because you believe in it. And then just going year after year after year and not seeing the proof you want and you've definitely pretty much fallen out of love of the like, hypothetical dream you thought this is going to be, but you stay committed no matter what. And I always say like not everyone is meant to be an entrepreneur. I think entrepreneurial is and has been thrown away, thrown around. Is this like really fancy word that the only way you're actually successful or worthy as a person is if you go and create something yourself. And I don't think everyone is meant to do that. I mean, if everyone was meant to do that, we would have no companies because nobody would work in our companies. We need teams. We need people that are incredible number twos. We need visionaries. We need people that want a clock and and clock out like we need everybody. So I don't think that that's what makes an entrepreneur. I think what makes an entrepreneur is how resourceful you are, how relentless you are, how resilient you are, how you have the ability to not make your current circumstances mean anything about your success. So whether it's right now or you're thinking about a business idea, but you're like, Oh, that's nice for her to say. She came from like a double income household. Yeah, I did. But what about during the time when I had business expenses? I had a team and my husband, I were making no money in our businesses and it was scary as hell. And we were behind on payments and we couldn't pay our bills and we were getting in debt. You still need the qualities of continuing to show up. I can't tell you how many times I had less than a dollar cash in my bank account, but we showed up every day as if it was going to be a $10,000 day because you But you better believe that there was a day that it was a $10,000 day. And it's like there is this level of just commitment that you have. And it is it has nothing to do. Sure. In the beginning, was it easier that we had a double income household? Yes. Is that what made me successful? No. It was the same opportunity of just because we have a double income, does it mean that we can only rely on that? So now I really have to get it in gear. And guess what? When that income goes away, my business better be able to support us during a very long period of time. And then when it can't support it, I've got to go find additional resources or I've got to get creative or I've got to be locked in even more. And there is going to be times in your life, in your entrepreneurial journey, where you're going to want to quit. And I can't tell you how many seasons I've gone through, which is every day I'm like, If I don't quit, I win. If I don't quit, I win. And there are a million reasons as to why I should quit, and everyone around you will tell you to quit. And it won't make sense to anybody. And this is what we glamorize. But when we're going through it, we demonize it. We make it mean something about us and our success, or we make it mean something about, Oh, they're stupid. They can't get it together or they made bad decisions. I mean, right now we've got a Netflix documentary coming out and Victoria Beckham, I mean, it took her 17 years, 17 years to turn a profit in her clothing brand. And everyone can say, well, isn't that nice? I think she burned through$66 million to make it happen. Could she do that because she had Spice Girls and she's married to David? David Beckham. Yes. But are we still celebrating the fact that she stayed in the fucking game when she didn't, quote unquote have to because she had a dream and she refused to let anyone else talk her out of it? Did she make plenty of mistakes along the way? Absolutely. Was she resilient? Was she committed no matter what? Did she show up every single day? Like today was going to be the day. Yes. And those are the characteristics of an entrepreneur that you either have or you don't. Whether you're in your job right now and you commit to getting out of your job or you don't, just like when you're in your business and you commit to how you're going to make payroll, even when you don't know how you're going to make payroll. Hey, quick one. Are you spinning your wheels for not moving forward? I know how frustrating it is when you're putting in the work, but not seen any progress in my free resource. Then that's 21 day challenge. You get some live group coaching to uncover your blindspots, you reignite your momentum. And finally make those bold moves you've been avoiding. Joined in the next round or get on the waitlist today. The link isn't a description. All right, back to the episode. Okay. Two things. Two things I didn't know, which was you just like dropping bombs on fire. And I would say, whoa, we one. Okay, okay. The first one you said something just now, which is you either have the skills or you don't. So to what extent do you mean that? Because sometimes you don't even know the skills you have until you put yourself through the fire, Right? So what are some ways because you you've you've, you've worked with different people, you've had your own team. So I'm sure you would, you know, you know, the kind of character, character traits that you want in somebody who is a great number to a great team builder. What would you see the character traits of someone who is a says, Don't worry or Obrador? Are they just be a very happy number two and the person that does all the processes versus you need to get out and go do your own thing. I'd say a number two is someone who wants to make the make something happen. Like they're like, Give, give me the blueprint. You just tell me what to do and I'm going to make it happen. Like you just you lead and I'm going to follow and I'm going to make sure everyone in the back has a sack lunch and we're all going to be on the same bus. That is a great number two. And there's like one of my best friends. She's like, I would never want to do my own thing. Like, I love making things happen for other people. I love being the executioner. Then you have the visionaries, the visionaries are like, Don't talk back. I only see it like this. We're going this way. We're doing it my way because this is the only way that I see that it's possible. And you're either on board or you're not. That is someone who is like a number one, someone that is not afraid of leadership, someone who has a self lead, someone that can make decisions quickly, that doesn't sit around and think, someone who is proactive, that is a problem solver, that is not afraid of pressure, that works well under pressure. Like and I'm not saying you have to have all of these qualities. It's just the big difference between a number one and number two is that a number two wants to follow behind someone who has basically the rulebook and they're just like, tell me what to do. And I'm going to make sure we're all on board. And the number one is like, I want to take the risk. I want to rig the rules. Yeah, I want to do what? I want to blaze a fucking trail, you know, and number twos, they don't they're, they're there with the fire extinguisher just in case the blaze gets out of control, you know? And we need both. And I think when it comes to an entrepreneur, entrepreneur, I always say, like, you're next level and life is just literally on the other side of a new skill set, skill sets. There's never been a better time to learn new set of skills. And I think what really sets people apart, the people that go for it, the true entrepreneurs, are people that are self-aware enough and have enough awareness that, Hey, I do need some support, I do need to, you know, maybe get a new skill set. I do think I need to get in a better community and they have a vision for themselves. So it's it's not always about being the fastest person in the room because that can be a bit impulsive, but it is about someone who has a vision, who also has a level of awareness of where they're starting at and has the ability and the the open mindedness to learn a new skill set. I'm so glad you touched on the support thing because I was going to be my next thing because early on you talked a lot about how the way a lot of times that you could have quit and you just kept telling yourself, if you don't quit now, it will happen for you. Success leaves clues, right? You've mentioned the importance of community, and I want us to dig deeper into that because you and I are really hard, hard, hard core music right now. But what other things would you say your success, What was the thing that just helped you to just stay in the game when everybody is telling you, I think it's time for you to go to give back to your market? I hate that phrase. Okay, shut up, buddy. What? Do you know anything about what you said? So, Yeah, well. Well, what I your success markers, I would say I have two. So the first one is like, I can't stop thinking about the thing about I do, even if I'm, like, frustrated at the results that I don't have yet, I ask myself, okay, where am I not validating myself? Where am I allowing outside noise like, you know, lack of, let's say, lack of new clients, let's say a defaulted payment plan, let's say not enough followers. Maybe a real didn't take off like any outside metric outside of myself. Why am I giving it meaning and having it record and firm, whatever my self self-doubt is? And how can I validate myself? How can I actually go and look for proof? So, for example, right now I'm running a challenge and one of my companies, my goal was 200 people and I find myself every day of the challenge going, But you didn't hit 200, you didn't hit, you didn't hit 200. And I'm like, Shut up, bitch. I hit 191. I mean, like if if I let those metrics talk to me about how I didn't hit 200, but I have to lock in. It's a choice. I'm like, But I have 191 and I'm a server 191. And even if seven show up to a live call, I'm going to pour into those seven like they're the greatest thing since sliced bread because they're exchanging their time with me. Like, I want to I want to overdeliver. So it's something when I go through those moments like, where is this not working out? I'm like, why am I why am I allowing this to validate my success and how can I validate my success for me, how can I look for proof that actually is in my favor? And also, there was a time and I and I just can't stop thinking about it. You even if I'm disappointed, I just I think about how I want to make edits to a book or I think about another course I want to run. I think about, let me throw up this reel or let me make this carousel like my brain. So goes. There is the first thing I think about is the last thing I think about. It's like I'm still obsessed. Even if I'm annoyed, I'm obsessed. And then the second thing is, there have been times and this is where I have to really check myself and this was this is a bit of a like, I think you're creating a problem where a problem doesn't exist, where I legit got online and tried to go find some jobs that I could go apply to during a time when I was like, Wow, this doesn't it's not working. You know, it's it's just clearly not working. And every job I found I was making more cash in my bank every month than that job would pay me. And that's when I was like, What are you doing? Like, what are you actually doing? You need to get back in your business. You need to double down. You need to take it to the next level. You need to get into a community. You need to work with. Someone is going to call you on this bullshit, but this is this is asinine. Like you're spending quality time and energy. That's what I said. You got to call your shame because we will. It will show up and you will sit in silence with that and you'll start telling yourself some bullshit story. So my bullshit story was, I'm not making any money. People aren't buying. This isn't working. Let me go look for jobs. And they're getting frustrated that the amount of money that would be paid to exchange 40 hours of my life every week I was already making sitting in my pajamas at home. And this is when I was like, No, girl, you actually just got to like, buckle up and get even more locked in. So signs of success are clues that you still stay on the path, even when it looks like it's not working. You can't stop thinking about it and you're already making some sort of money or you have some sort of inquiry. And guess what? That's not even hard because if you were to lock in for like two weeks and really go all in on this, someone is going to message you, someone is going to comment, someone's going to like something and they're eventually going to buy and buyers become buyers on the day that they buy. And the only job you have is literally create something for them to buy. So signs of clues that you should stick with the past. You think about it all the time. It's what you want to do and you've in your heating up an audience of buyers. Yeah, I so love that. I love the way you said you are annoyed with love. Obsessed. I was. I was trying to, though, laugh out loud, so I don't interrupt you. I was just like, Oh, my God, yes, I am. I go so relatable because I am so obsessed to my stuff. Like they this morning, the thoughts that I had, the very first thought that I had as soon as I got up, not even what is days today it was, Oh yeah, I need to share that in my content. Like what? First of all, what day is today? Or maybe sometimes like I'm, I'm sleeping and I'm sure you can relate with this. Your sleep is so sweet and it's nice. And then that thing does visitors just come to your bed So like, Hey, Francesca, we call couple, we call. We have this wonderful idea for you. I think it's so like, Oh, yeah, I go find my phone and I'm putting in the notes and it's it's really, really great to hear that from you, because I think that that's just a telltale sign that this for me personally that, look, I am on the right path because I love this stuff. Whereas when it comes to like my 9 to 5 work and I don't I don't demonize corporate, although sometimes I'm just really angry because it's been a stepping stone for me. It's helped me to find, you know, my own personal business. But the stuff that I do, I'm just so I can so check out from it. I just I checked out, you know, a and then I come back so I can make we all always look and I vote again yesterday, whereas I can't stop thinking about this stuff that I do. I get off a call with a client and I'm like, Oh my gosh, that was amazing. How could I have made it better for the for them? How can I show better for them again, What else can I do? You know? So I, I saw social of that. I and I'm so glad you said that. Then the other thing that I want us to dig deep into that I think people tend to overlook are you've mentioned it a times now is community. We can't do this thing alone. And I know that's how I met you like and I've seen I have witnessed a lot of your wins, your struggles, and honestly, even that alone is a gift. At least speaking for myself. And I want to hear your also, like how community has helped you personally. For me personally, I log in and I look and I'll see Francesca. You know, she shares how leans. And I'm like, Oh, she did all that. And I don't know how to explain it, but when you all are sharing your wins, I honestly feel like it's happening for me. And I think that it's because I know that these people, you know, like saw like you, you, you are after you are not stopping at anything to build a life that you want. And again, you said it earlier, this is not just for the money. This is the fulfillment that it brings, the lives that it touches. And it's so much even bigger than you. Right? And for me, when I'm the community or the people that think like that and they are women, it feels like, oh, my gosh, yeah. Is possible for her is possible for me. If is happy for her, it's happening for me too. And I just need to, I don't know, stick myself as glued to all this. People are there. It were virtually helpful for me. And when I share my when they're able for my own stuff to I you know, what's what I for me is what's great about it is I maybe have been an off day like a low day like oh like for example, maybe getting distracted by the things that you talked about, some vanity things like, Oh, millennials are the real that I use all my friends reading all that. And then I just see somebody when I'm like, Girl, you this, you got problems. You know what? I, I work here for you personally over your journey. Like even when you think about me, it's not just the one that we're in now, but just other communities that you've been a part of. How have they helped you personally? Yeah, I want to give some context because the way I grew up, I was very lone wolf, so I just always thought I do it myself. I don't need anyone's help. Nobody's going to come save me. Failure is not an option. But like, honestly, nobody's opinion matters to me. It's it's only mine. And what I didn't realize, looking back, like I always put myself in community, that would raise me up. So whether that was in college and being part of a sorority, whether that was getting married and living in Dubai and being in an a very like, entrepreneurial minded place. Coming back to Houston, Texas, starting a company there, but being around just groups of entrepreneurs, you know, I sought out community without really realizing it. And it wasn't until going into the online space, you know, the pandemic happened. We all kind of got shut down, being at home and then deciding I wanted to go into personal development because I was now being a coach for these. I went from the floral industry to now be an online educator talking about how flowers can work with hotels, because that was my specialty. And then quickly realizing I'm getting on Zoom calls with women that are like me, that have the same insecurities I have. And then I was like, Oh my gosh, like, who am I to lead these women? So then I wanted to go and learn about myself and become a better leader. And community didn't really show up for me in that sense until being the online space where you're kind of like picking and choosing what kind of groups you want to be associated with and been associated with a lot of them. And I think they've all been beautiful in different ways. But community is very important for a number of reasons. One, your family and your partner are really most likely not going to get what it is that you want to do or where it is that you're going and they can really only see you through how much they can see of themselves like they're there. It's very narrow sighted and it's not because they're bad people and it's not because that they don't try hard enough. They just really don't know what it's like. Like you don't know what it's like to be a blind person because you can see and vice versa. And what happens, though, is we really care about what those people think about us, and especially, you know, our partners and our parents and our siblings and like we don't want to let people down and we kind of have this like internal battle with ourselves because we know we want to be this one version of us. But we're also kind of constantly reminded that we're not that version yet. And if we're not that version by now, then when is it going to happen? And people naturally also project their own limitations on you and their own disappointments on you. And and this is where community is so important because you're able to take yourself out of that environment and you're able to put yourself in an environment where everyone is like minded and everyone is on the same path. And if you're not winning today, I'm winning. And if I'm not winning today, you're winning. And it's constantly reminding each other that winning is inevitable. You know, just everyone's on a different timeline. And as long as part of an organization, our group where everyone's putting in the same work, they have the the same destination, but nobody's projecting on each other about how they're not going fast enough or they're not doing it good enough. Then we all get there. And I think that is a lot of people overlook mentorship because they just think and I was one of those people up until 2020, I thought, Well, if you want to be a business owner and you need to hire a business coach, you don't need to be a business owner because clearly you don't know what you're doing. Like that was my attitude and I got to, you know, quarter million dollars with that attitude. And then I quickly realized, ah, maybe this is why I haven't been able to get past, you know, 300, 400,000 a year. Maybe this is why the idea of becoming a millionaire seemed absolutely ludicrous to me. Like who becomes millionaires? I mean, I was a girl. I grew up without running water. I was happy with my 253 5400. And when I got my first community, it was all about millionaires. It was all about popping like millionaires, popping like popcorn. And I'm like, Are these people high on life? Like, where are these people making millions from? But then I got obsessed with the idea of making millions, and I was like, Well, shit, I think one day I'm going to be a millionaire. You know what? I'll be the first millionaire in my family and and community is to sum it up, why I think it's so incredibly important. It's like faith. Faith is believing without proof. Being in a community is proof when you don't have proof, because there's no way that it can happen for me and it can't happen for you and vice versa. And so when you're just around winners and not and I've been in groups where it's been performative, that's not fun. I've been in groups where you don't really feel comfortable to show up and say, Hey, I have a dollar in my bank account and I don't know how I'm going to make this should happen. And you know, I'm going to celebrate a huge cash when Today. But all that cash is already earmarked for debt. But I'm so proud that I get to pay my debt off. Blah, blah, blah. There's you don't feel comfortable sharing that. But when you're in a community, I think that's like something that has been incredible, that we are a part of where everything you do is a win. You know, every single hardship is something that people take on and they learn a lesson from or they get inspired by. And everyone feels comfortable going in and winning and nobody's competing on wins and like we're all so genuinely happy for each other. That is rare. But I'd say be in a community where people are like minded. They're going in the same direction as you. You're going to get there so much faster and I think it's gonna be so much easier and more fun because being a lone wolf is very lonely. Mm. Wow. Honestly, I felt myself tearing up when you said, you know, being in the community is kind of like faith, because faith is doing something and not having proof. And community is that proof. And I was like, That's it. Show is over, guys. I think, Wow. Mike dropped. Mike dropped that Mike Because I'm just saying, oh my gosh, you I think that was what I was trying to say in a thousand words earlier about the win feels like mine sake. Yes. Because it is it is proof you nailed it. They're like, oh, look, just like, this is amazing. They hate you so much. I'm loving this conversation. It's like my absolute pleasure. Oh, my gosh. Okay. So I know that some people are probably leaning in like, who is this lady? And how do I get to know her? They tell us all the things. What the things you're working on now. How how, how do you want people to find you to get into your world? Tell us all of that. I would say I'm sure we're going to put down below link to Instagram, but I'm always on Instagram. It's my first name on my last name, but it's 18 letters long and I don't expect anyone to know how to spell it randomly because I've had people follow me on my business account, which is the hotel florist. I specialize in helping florist create consistent income through hotel partnerships so they don't have to depend on weddings. And my personal brand, I really help especially driven women who have had any type of experience with childhood trauma or just identity work in general to come back home to themselves. And I do that through human design and especially if you're a four line and human design. And I know for some of you might sound like I'm speaking Chinese, but community is essential for your growth and I always love helping people learn about who they are becoming the next version of themselves. With my identity work, I had to adopt an avatar that I named Goddess Millionairess, and I can guarantee you that when I did this I was either Goddess nor millionairess, and I thought it was absolutely ludicrous, but it helped me become the version that I am today, and that was really seeing life through her lens. Like, what does Goddess Millionairess eat? How does she handle her boundaries? How does goddess millionaires communicate? What is she shopping for? What is she wearing? How does she present herself? And any time we are looking to up level in life, whether it's, you know, leaving that 9 to 5 or changing pivoting in our businesses or how we want to represent ourselves, we oftentimes need to get behind some sort of avatar to make that happen, because otherwise we kind of stay in the same place, we make decisions from the place that we are right now. And that's been great. It's got us to this point, but it's not going to help us get us to where it is that we want to go next. So it's identity work is something that you're looking for human design, you know, especially identity after trauma. That's that's what I specialize in and I'd love to chat more. So do you feel like we gave everyone the nuts and bolts that are in the 9 to 5 that are ready to expand? Do you feel like we need to leave them off with any tips or anything? What are you vibing with? What do you want to know? They know what they want and what do I want to know? We've given them a lot to ponder, even me a lot to ponder as. Well, I would say while you're thinking the 9 to 5, I feel like it's such a gift because it is stability. It does allow you to determine how fast you're going to put your foot on the on the gas. And when I think about clients I've worked with that have had 9 to 5 come to me after, you know, a 20 plus career in something. And they're like, I just know my soul is dying and I really want to do this thing. And I, you know, I'm so scared because, you know, I'm in my fifties and people are like, this is so stupid, Like, you're so close to retirement and why do you want to, like, throw this away? When I think about the moves they have had to make, they got themselves in a place where they weren't too comfortable, but they had something set aside, but it gave them about, you know, a few months to get it going where they didn't have the opportunity to get to relax. But they could also not. They could also sleep at night and I feel like if you're ready to leave your 9 to 5, you just cut your expenses, set that cash aside, tell yourself, okay, once I hit three months, once I hit six months, like whatever your reserve is, and then when you hit that celebrate by quitting your job and you're already starting your business like you're already working on your business, that's not going to change. You're just going to have more time to pour into your business and think about if you're already seeing success. Now, at the time ratio that you're able to give it, then you're the success is only going to be tenfold when you can give it ten times the amount of time. So that's been something that I know it's been really helpful for my clients and I've had a client. She left after just a few months. She knew it was the right thing and within months she replace her corporate salary and never looked back. So it is totally possible. But you're the only person that's driving that and you have to determine the speed. Yeah. No, I that that is actually great advice, especially for people who feel like, oh, I'm already at this age, it's too late for me. It's too late. It's only late if you're dead. Exactly. Exactly. And it's just it's just this bullshit story that people tell themselves, like, No, it's not too late. They it's funny because they think it's too late for them to start. Was not too leads to just continue on this trajectory. And they're looking forward to their retirement, say, 15 years from now. Think they can make sense? They it doesn't make any sense at all. And think about it. If you were to leave, like I guarantee you, you know, she left let's say she left. This business didn't take off. The business didn't replace her corporate salary. She didn't have the freedom that she wanted. We traveled the world together. We're about to go to our fourth country next year together on a retreat. Let's say none of that happened. And she went back to her. Her job. I guarantee I can't guarantee for legal reasons, but I can say with certainty that when you go back to your job, you're going to be paid more. When you leave one job and you go to another job, you can negotiate a higher, higher raise. So you win. Either way, it's honor. You know what? We've come full circle because this is literally what you said in the beginning, which is two fold. You don't go with the conviction that is going to work out for you. And if it doesn't work out for you, what's the worst that can happen right. That is amazing. You'll go back to where you're at right now. Yeah. Yeah, but probably better. Exactly. Better and wiser and if you decide to pick it back up again, you would have learned so much about yourself that it's just like, you know, next level. Yeah. Yeah. Or failure failures on option. Yeah the real failure is not trying. Yeah not going for it is not trying. Yeah. Honestly that, that sums it up. We don't need to you have to wrap this thing up in so many pretty balls. I if you're listening to this, I still don't have a nugget. I you so you got to get your hearing checked. Yeah. No, this was so good. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much. Protest that I have my pleasure. I just see. I saw admire you and. Oh, they give all the things that you've done, and you're great, man. They Wow, that. That's award award level grit, y'all. And I saw I admire that. And I'm cheering you on here and in our community. And I cannot wait to see what you do over the next even 3 to 5 years. Not even a decade. I'm just saying I'm so excited for you and excited to see what you build. So thank you for this. Yeah. And we're just getting started. So that's the exciting part. It's right. Thanks for tuning in to Grow with Keppel. This episode sparked something for you. Subscribe, share it with a friend and keep growing.